Florida Man receives a standing ovation that he never wanted
Today we tell a tale from the Livestock concert that is historically known as “Mudstock”. My friend Gilbert along with just about everyone else I knew went to this years weekend long concert. Livestock is a big concert where people camp out and there’s a lot of fighting and flashing to make your walk from the campgrounds to where the bands play a real adventure. All surrounded by a lot of pot smoking and drinking. It’s a good time to be had by all. This particular year a big rainstorm came through a made so much mud that thousands of people were stuck out there but that’s another story for another day. On the first night Gilbert had done his fair share of drinking and went back to his campground for a bit of relaxation. It would seem all the scantily clad ladies and random flashings had him worked up though. When in his tent he commenced to making serious love to himself. He proceeded to beat his meat like it owed him money. Apparently, this went on for a while or so the tail goes. Upon finishing Gilbert decided to go look for his friends. However, no sooner had he stepped out of his tent did a round of applause erupted from a crowd of people that were standing there looking in his direction. Gilbert was a tad bit confused by this so he turned around and looked and saw his tent was fully lit up by the campfire directly behind it and he could see all his stuff perfectly casting shadows on the wall. The laughing crowd was not dispersing. It was at this point that Gilbert had to make a decision. He bundled up his tent, grabbed all his stuff and threw it in the back of his pick up truck and left. He didn’t even just go to another area of the concert venue. He left and went home entirely. Of course, he should have kept this to himself. He made the mistake of telling his cousin who proceeded to tell everyone anytime Gilbert was hanging out with us.